Make a Wish

Today should have been a day of celebration. It should have been a day of sugar-free cake and wrapped presents that would eventually reveal Yankees apparel and memorabilia, barbecue tools and New York Giants tee shirts.

But, instead, today is sad.

Today, my Dad would have been 57. Still young. Still vibrant. Still yearning to experience everything that life has to offer.

Today, I'd give anything to be able to wish him a happy birthday. To be scouring the stores for the Yankees shirt he didn't already own. To have him mad at all of us for even making a big deal about the fact that he was a year older.

Yes, 57 years ago, today, an incredible man was born. A man that I miss every day. But especially today.

I keep hearing it gets easier. I know this has to be true but, for now, I can't think about celebrating his life when I'm still grieving the loss of it.

I do feel fortunate to have spent my Dad's last birthday with him but, now, I feel like I should have done more. Not that I could have known, but if I had, I would have done more, given more. More love. More time. More life. Things we probably don't wish for when blowing out those candles but the things that suddenly become so important when we lose someone we love. Things that are important to me now.